Budhiya, ghar mein baith! (Sit at home, you old lady!)
Haddi toot jayegi. (You’ll break your bones.)
Mata ji, bhagwan ka naam lo. (Focus on worshipping God.)
These were some of the harsh comments Mukta Singh encountered on social media when she decided to become a model at 58. Facing immense societal judgement, especially from the younger generation, she braved the criticism with grace and now proudly flaunts her grey hair! “There were times when I felt hurt reading mocking comments on Instagram. They used to upset me a lot, but not anymore! Their judgement will not stop me,” says Mukta, now 61.
When she was younger, Mukta always admired older women who did not give up on themselves and stayed stylish. For instance, her grandmother, who looked elegant in cotton Bengali sarees in her late 50s, and her mother, who wanted to be well-dressed even on her deathbed.
“Instead of sticking to stereotypes that say I shouldn’t care about being stylish at my age, I wanted to show the world that I still take pride in myself and this is how much I respect and value myself. It’s a question of self-worth and self-esteem,” Mukta tells The Better India.
In a society that often overlooks the beauty and wisdom that come with age, Mukta emphasises the importance of nurturing one’s identity and passions, regardless of age or societal expectations. As she continues to inspire many with her journey of self-discovery and empowerment, she exemplifies the beauty of embracing one’s true self, unapologetically, at every stage of life.
A reality check in the mirror
After completing her master’s in English, Mukta married a fighter pilot. This forced the family to constantly relocate from one air base to another. As she juggled raising her two children and adjusting to new environments, she found solace in teaching English.
It wasn’t until her late 30s that Mukta began to explore diverse opportunities and fields such as art galleries, event marketing, and writing for magazines.
At times, however, Mukta felt that her desire to look good was taking a backseat amidst all the household responsibilities. “As a woman raising two kids while managing a career, I often felt stretched. I would dress my children well, but I was happy wearing an old shirt and jeans. Sometimes, when I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror, I’d think, ‘Oh! Is this really how I look?’ It wasn’t how I imagined myself,” she shares.
Gradually, Mukta started feeling insecure. “My good-looking husband would often fly with young, beautiful cabin crew members. This would leave me with a sense of insecurity. I didn’t like the person I was becoming – insecure, jealous, and unhappy,” she adds.
As her children grew more independent, Mukta went on to pursue her interests in art and painting. Inspired by her love for music, she started creating portraits of renowned musicians like Bob Marley, Mick Jagger, and David Bowie.
Life unfolded with its unique challenges, including her mother’s battle with cancer and her dog’s paralysis. As a result, she fully devoted herself to looking after them, and due to lack of time, stopped colouring her hair. “People told me that if I stopped colouring my hair, I would look like someone who had given up on life. But I promised myself to carry my greys beautifully,” she says.
This became a pivotal moment for Mukta.
‘I no longer deprive myself’
Mukta chose to embrace her natural grey hair, defying societal norms that equate ageing with a loss of vitality and beauty. This decision to accept her changing appearance marked a transformative shift toward self-acceptance and empowerment.
Mukta’s daughter, Malika Singh, believes that voicing stereotypes about elderly people wearing red lipstick or bright-coloured clothes only reinforces them. She notes, “I don’t believe such stereotypes exist unless we let them. They aren’t as rigid as we make them out to be until we give them power. My mother is breaking those stereotypes. I think it’s important to have a zest for life. My friends always tell me that they want to be like her and consider her a friend.”
At one wedding, Mukta chose to complement her look with a metallic grey saree instead of the customary bright-coloured clothing. “I received a lot of compliments and attention. The photographs came out beautifully, and I posted them on Instagram, tagging the designer. To my surprise, the designer reached out and said he wanted to photograph me,” she shares.
After modelling for the designer, Mukta started receiving numerous opportunities from popular designers who were eager to promote inclusivity and drive change. Through these unexpected opportunities in the modelling world, she found a platform to celebrate her unique style and individuality.
“It was finally time for me to celebrate my life and the desires I had kept hidden — the cosmetics, the clothes I always wanted to pull off. I no longer deprive myself, and I’m glad I am fulfilling my dreams,” she adds.
Mukta strongly believes in the power of self-respect and self-worth, transcending age barriers while embracing every stage of life with joy and confidence. Speaking about societal expectations for women her age, she says, “A woman is expected to take care of the family, but that shouldn’t come at the cost of completely undermining and neglecting yourself. Physical health and appearance may seem trivial, but they play a significant role in a woman’s sense of self-worth.”
Mukta’s story inspires us to challenge the stigma, stereotypes, and discrimination that portray elderly women as less important, less worthy, and less beautiful. “Ageing takes us by surprise — one day, you’re young, and the next, you’re in the senior citizen bracket. We need to change our perspective toward ageing. Enjoy the privileges it brings,” she suggests.
Edited by Khushi Arora; All photos: Mukta Singh.
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