Does the constant uncertainty of life leave you feeling overwhelmed? Most days, ticking things off our mental checklists — finances, love and career — feels like attempting to hit a bull’s-eye in the dark. And we wonder, is it all leading up to a grand finale?
Mercy Rego (63) wants to give us a spoiler alert: “Everything figures itself out.”
How can she be so sure?
Not many decades ago, like us, Mercy says she and her clique were perplexed by the course their individual lives would take. But it was frugal to worry, these women in their sixties deduce as they look back on the years.
I must admit, the story that I embarked on assuming to be an aspirational travel piece — about a group of women who went on a girls’ trip in their 60s — turned out to be cathartic for me in more ways than one. The adventures of Mercy and her friends make a compelling case for how life needs to be lived rather than ticked off a checklist.
So how did it all happen, you ask?
Turns out, a Facebook post, a little stalking, and a whole lot of bravado was what it took.
Rekindling a childhood magic
“Mom, you know you can find anyone you want to on the internet, right?” Mercy’s son asked her one day.
Excited at the prospect, the academician’s first thought was to look up her school friends whom she had seen the last of on their class 10 farewell. “We had been together since kindergarten, then moved to different colleges to pursue different streams. Eventually, we moved cities and then countries, got married and went our separate ways. We lost touch completely.”
But Mercy remembered her gang, some by name, others by face. And when her son managed to find one friend, it led her down a rabbit hole to the rest; the group now calls itself the ‘Class of 1977’. In time, genial conversations that unlocked memories from their school years — skirting the rules and playing innocent truant — were followed by plans to meet up in Mumbai. Mercy points out, “Our conversations made us realise nothing much had changed. We were the same bubbly girls we were in school.”
‘Let’s do a girls’ trip’
I haven’t ever met Mercy or the other five. But I know them through Mercy’s vivid descriptions. I know Radhika Krishnan loves a good vada pav (Indian snack) and that Ophelia Fernandes brings the fun to the party. I know that Anjali Vichare topped in science, that Usha Talawdekar loves to cook and Shachi Ugrankar is the reason the others are laughing half the time. I also know their school secrets — but I’ve been sworn to secrecy.
Mercy’s anecdotes tell me that reconnecting after a hiatus like this one is almost like knocking on the doors to the past and discovering new versions of the stories that once lay behind them. It’s almost like becoming friends once again.
Elaborating on the trip to Bengaluru in 2022, she says the ‘trial holiday’ was meant to be a prequel to the much-anticipated and potential international trip that they were planning. “We had to see if we could gel after so many years,” she explains. “We decided to go to Kolar Mines.” The trip made them realise that their bonds were evergreen.
“There was so much to talk about; we didn’t get out of the farmhouse for four days. We would wake up, spend the day singing, swim in the pool, dance and eat.”
School, it seems, formed the scaffolding of some of their best years. “There was this girl May Jacinto in school who excelled at arts and crafts. I remember asking her to do my projects in exchange for helping her with her homework,” Mercy reminisces.
Then came the age of crushes. “We would write letters and hide them in our notebooks. Once, someone’s mother found a letter that was intended for one of the girls’ neighbours. While we laugh about it now, it was traumatic at the time,” Mercy is in splits.
Needless to say, the Bengaluru trip was a success.
Convinced that they should go international, the six women planned a trip in 2023 to Malaysia. And it was a riot of fun! The length and breadth of their conversations covered yesteryear, fellow batchmates, and some juicy secrets about the other. It wasn’t all gupshup though.
The women visited a chocolate factory, cruised in a speed boat, and sauntered off in a cable car, putting on their bravest and most adventurous faces. “Secretly we thought our intestines would come out,” chuckles Ophelia, admitting that from start to end, the trip was everything she dreamed of.
What really amuses her, she says, is how those childhood friendships anchored in innocence had metamorphosed into adult bonds that were liberating. “We didn’t judge each other then — when we were doing the stupidest things, dancing to old Bollywood numbers, and being naughty in school — and we don’t judge each other now. When we meet as a group, we forget all our aches and pains and hardships.”
‘Retire from work, not life’
Having a group of confidants to turn to makes life easier, according to Mercy. “I think once people retire, they assume it is time to sit at home and relax.” But she urges senior citizens to use this time to take life by the reins and venture into the deep end.
Judging by Mercy’s bold diktat, you’d presume she has always embodied this ‘go-getter’ attitude. Her friends tell me she has. Albeit, for the longest time she wasn’t channeling it. “I was a homemaker and looking after three kids. At the age of 46, I decided to become a teacher and trained and joined a Montessori school. I steadily climbed up the ladder and was made principal of the Cambridge International School, Mangaluru.”
Currently, Mercy is a professor of life skills at a degree college in Mangaluru.
As if to underscore her intrepidity, she shows off a tattoo that she got done when she turned 60. The open cage signifies freedom, she explains. And on this note, she circles back to the millennial me.
“Don’t make the mistakes we made. Enjoy life,” she tells me, urging me to give in to spontaneity. “Money will come, houses will come, love will come and everything will fall into place. But don’t lose your youth. Don’t forget to enjoy the present. You don’t know what tomorrow holds.”
And above all, she urges, hold on tight to your childhood friends. The six agree. The current of life may have carried them in different directions. But, they are glad to have reached the same shore.
Edited by Arunava Banerjee; Pictures source: Mercy Rego.
No comments:
Post a Comment